?

Log in

No account? Create an account
 
 
28 October 2011 @ 04:24 pm
Fic: Untitled -- Supernatural  
Title: Untitled
Pairing/Characters: wincest (Dean/Sam)
Word Count: 1194
Warnings: language, incest
Notes: maii furst wincest!!1! I'm excited to be trying out this pairing for the first time.  Set vaguely during season 3. Comments are absolute love!


It’s the end of the world. The sky’s a musty yellow and everything reeks of sulfur. They’re on the road headed away from Bobby Singer’s Auto Shop, and Dean’s glad.

It’s not that doesn’t like Bobby—hell, Bobby’s probably his second favorite person alive—but he just needs time. Time alone with himself and the dark patches of his mind; time with Sam and the bright places where they overlap.

God, he loves Sam.

-

They pull off at a shitty roadside hotel. The woman behind the counter barely looks up as she slides Dean’s cash across and hands him the key. She puts the money in the cash register without bothering to count it, and Dean wonders if maybe, in some small way, she knows what’s happening. Perhaps she sees black out of the corner of her eye, smells hellfire on the wind.

Sam takes his arm and drags him to their room.

-

It’s not the nicest of places, but it’s not the worst, so. It’ll do. The bed Dean tosses his pack onto sags alarmingly under its weight, but the springs aren’t showing so it’s good.

-

They take pizza in and eat it sitting on Sam’s bed—Dean’s is crap, and anyway, Sam’s is closer to the TV.

Dean’s honestly not sure what they’re watching. It was a “Hell’s Kitchen” marathon, but now it’s something else with no discernable plot and an alarmingly low food content.

“Hey,” he says.

“Yeah?”

Dean is silent for a long moment. He isn’t sure whether or not he wants to have this conversation, and the mixture of dread and need in his stomach isn’t exactly helpful.

Oh, fuck it, he thinks. He turns his face to Sam’s, expression bland.

“I haven’t got much time left,” he says. He glances at Sam’s eyes; they’re unreadable and distant. He waits patiently for one of Sam’s denials, but it doesn’t come.

“I know.”

The admission both scares Dean more than he’d like to admit, and comforts him.

“I don’t wanna go to hell.”

“I know,” Sam says again, but this time there’s a little break in his voice, and when Dean looks up, his jaw has the clenched look of almost-tears.

Dean knows he should say something like, “If I’d known you were gonna get all emotional on me, I’d never have brought it up,” but he just can’t. He’s too tired.

“I’m so tired, Sammy,” he whispers. He half-expects another I know, but—

“Me, too,” says Sam, and he leans his shoulder softly against Dean’s.

Dean’s heartbeat is slow and thick in his ears. It’s the end of the world, and he can hear the hellhounds scrabbling at his ankles. He does something stupid; he leans in and presses his lips to Sam’s.

The kiss is rough. Dean’s always imagined his brother’s lips would be soft, but they’re not. They’re chapped and taste of the pizza. Dean’s pretty sure that he could stay in this position for days, learning the taste, but Sam pushes him off.

“What the hell are you doing?”

Dean’s pretty sure it’s meant to be forceful, but it comes out as barely a whisper.

Dean’s not really sure what to say. I’m being us, he thinks. I’m sealing the cracks between us, Sammy, and—

I want--

But he doesn’t say those things, he can’t, so he simply sits and stares at Sam with pleading eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he says.

He’s not. He used to be, oh, how he used to be, the guilt like the weight of the world pressing down on his shoulders.

He’s given that up, now. He’s already damned and he’s done apologizing for his sins, especially when he thinks that this sin—the sin of loving Sammy—may be the very best part of him.

Sam smiles suddenly, breaking Dean out of his thoughts. “I used to want to be normal. Remember?”

His face is a mask of loss pierced by the glint of his smile. He leans closer to Dean. “I don’t care anymore.” His voice gets quieter. “I don’t want you to die, Dean.”

“I don’t want to go,” whispers Dean. He presses a kiss to the edge of Sam’s mouth, and this time Sam doesn’t resist, Sam leans into it, and Dean can feel his brother’s heartbeat racing like it’s his own.

-

The air in the motel room is thick and heavy. Dean breathes it in, deep, as he shoves his little brother down onto the bed and slides his hands underneath his shirt, running his fingers over the curves of the muscles Sammy worked so hard for.

He aches with how much he wants Sam.

Dean kisses him and the taste of sulfur lights in his mouth. It’s the end of the world, and Dean Winchester doesn’t give a shit, doesn’t care about anything that isn’t Sam.

Sam gives a little moan of pleasure, and Dean lets himself slide under and lose himself in the folds of his brother.

-

Dean loves the feel of his brother underneath him, and fuck, he doesn’t want to leave this. He presses his hands against Sam’s hipbones as if to anchor himself there, and bites his tongue to keep from crying or yelling or worse. Pain shoots through his mouth and he tastes the sticky, metallic tang of blood. Sam’s eyes are wide and young and Dean locks their mouths together and sucks.

-

Dean fucks Sam. It’s harsh and dirty and Dean hates it and loves it at the same time. He shouldn’t, and he doesn’t care in the slightest.

Dean presses his thighs to the sides of Sam’s ass, Sam splayed beneath him, sweaty and hot to the touch.

Sam’s amazing and incredible and Dean can’t ever lose him, and Dean doesn’t think he could ever regret dying for him.

But then, he’s having sex with his goddamned brother, and Dean Winchester doesn’t regret a thing.

He shakes off thoughts of death to press himself to Sam, fitting their bodies together. His lips brush the back of Sam’s neck like a prayer. He wishes he could find the words to tell Sam how much he loves him, but words were never his strong suit.

He has to rely on flesh instead, on meshing their bodies to create one instead of two, on opening Sam’s mouth and fucking into it with his tongue.

He thinks it’ll be enough.

-

They break apart but not, and Dean doesn’t know how long they lie there in the dark, fingers entwined, Sam pressed close into the curve of Dean’s chest.

Dean doesn’t remember dropping off, but when he does he dreams of Sam, and demon eyes in the darkness.

-

Dean lies on his back and stares at the ceiling, cracked and flaking. He’s not sure how long he’s been awake watching sunlight creep into the room, or how long ago Sammy started stirring beside him. He angles his head towards his brother.

"The hellhounds are on my heels," he says.

"I know," says Sam, softly.

Sam is alive and beautiful and ruined beside him, and Dean must be high on pleasure or something, because --

"Don’t worry," he whispers. "We’ll take ‘em all, Sammy."
 
 
Current Music: brandnew-- you won't know
 
 
 
gunznammo2gunznammo2 on October 28th, 2011 09:43 pm (UTC)
Love our boys. The ending brought tears to my eyes, hon. So sad but beautiful too. Thank you. : )
SHINOBI: andoriansshinobi_mi_chan on October 29th, 2011 03:55 pm (UTC)
No, bb, thank you! I'm glad I was able to invoke a bit of emotion. c:
pinkwithoutplotpinkwithoutplot on October 28th, 2011 10:00 pm (UTC)
"He’s already damned and he’s done apologizing for his sins, especially when he thinks that this sin—the sin of loving Sammy—may be the very best part of him."

Gosh, that's beautiful :) This was just heartbreaking and perfectly captures the desperate, unspoken feeling of S3. You did such a lovely job with this.
SHINOBI: garek bash sickbayshinobi_mi_chan on October 29th, 2011 04:01 pm (UTC)
Flailing a little from this comment, bb. I love the feel of season 3 and I really wanted to write something with it, so I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thank you! &hearts
Author, visionary, dreamweaver: Supernaturaltoratio on October 28th, 2011 10:53 pm (UTC)
So beautiful. Dean's pain and his determination and love. <3
SHINOBI: malcolm and tripshinobi_mi_chan on October 29th, 2011 04:07 pm (UTC)
Thanks, love. I'm glad you enjoyed Dean. <333
I'm Mulder, She's Scullyrunedgirl on October 29th, 2011 12:09 am (UTC)
that's quite beautiful in its sadness and desperation.
SHINOBI: captain jack harknessshinobi_mi_chan on October 29th, 2011 04:15 pm (UTC)
Thank you! &hearts (love your icon, btw. c:)
ash_carpenterash_carpenter on October 29th, 2011 09:40 am (UTC)
This is gorgeous. It's sad and desperate, but gorgeous - and so them. ♥
SHINOBI: kirkshinobi_mi_chan on October 29th, 2011 04:11 pm (UTC)
"Desperate" is exactly the feeling I was going for! You're too kind, bb, thank you.
jespretenderjespretender on October 29th, 2011 10:50 am (UTC)
Utterly heart wrenching.
SHINOBI: pineshinobi_mi_chan on October 29th, 2011 04:19 pm (UTC)
Thank you!
zenamydogzenamydog on October 29th, 2011 12:10 pm (UTC)
Absolutely beautiful 'first time'. Love it so much, but I have to say, the ending confused me.
SHINOBI: dirty hippies!shinobi_mi_chan on October 29th, 2011 05:43 pm (UTC)
Thank you, bb! Glad you enjoyed it, and sorry you're a tad confused. ( can I help?)
Andiepaper_storm88 on October 30th, 2011 02:28 am (UTC)
Oh sweet tap dancing Misha!! That was amazing. Beautiful and heartbreaking and amazing. So god damn sad, I just .... guh. I may need to go sob for three or four hours now, lol. But I loved it so much.
SHINOBI: andoriansshinobi_mi_chan on October 30th, 2011 05:38 pm (UTC)
"Oh sweet tap dancing Misha" is pretty much the best reaction I could've ever hoped for, :P. Thank you so much (though I'm sorry for making you want to cry...it's all Kripke's fault!) &hearts
Sabrinaslf630 on October 30th, 2011 03:13 am (UTC)
*sniffles* Season 3 fics kill me. So achingly beautiful, especially the end. Well done.
SHINOBI: flaming bentleyshinobi_mi_chan on October 30th, 2011 05:48 pm (UTC)
Season 3 kills me, too. I glad you enjoyed it though, thank you! (your icon's gorgeous, btw.)
twnchesterangeltwnchesterangel on October 30th, 2011 04:32 am (UTC)
OMG I loved this SOOO much! Paperstorm rec'd it to me and I'm SO glad she did. Although she's going to have to cheer me up now cuz this was SO incredibly sad. If desperate was what you were going for, I'd say you succeeded. I have such a hard time watching S3 because I always always feel like I have a giant lead stone in my gut. It's so painful! But I love it at the same time. And yes, desperate is the perfect word to describe it. This fic has the same exact feeling. Just beautiful. Thanks so much for this. I reeeeeally hope you write more of these boys. You've got a really good handle on them. *hugs*
SHINOBI: garek bash sickbayshinobi_mi_chan on October 30th, 2011 06:04 pm (UTC)
Oh my god, bb, this comment makes me very happy. \o/ Beautiful, broken, desperate... that's what I get from season 3 (that a shitload of tears, :P) and I'm so glad you got similar feelings from this. You are too kind! And I will definitely be writing more of our lovely boys. c: *hugs back*
Mistraliwith_rainfall on March 5th, 2012 02:36 am (UTC)
He wishes he could find the words to tell Sam how much he loves him, but words were never his strong suit.

He has to rely on flesh instead, on meshing their bodies to create one instead of two, on opening Sam’s mouth and fucking into it with his tongue.


Oh, man, I loved that. And the ending... <3
SHINOBI: a bit of fry and laurieshinobi_mi_chan on March 7th, 2012 03:35 am (UTC)
<333 to you as well. Thank you, bb, I glad you enjoyed.